Travel Update #1

Delta can go piss up a rope. As per usual, they made a solid attempt to bollocks everyone’s evening. A late departure gave one dude near us negative minutes to get to his gate. Luckily we had about 45 minutes to get to ours, albeit, the international terminal at Hartsfield-Jackson.

The situation immediately improved when we boarded the KLM flight to Amsterdam. Honestly one of the best (significant) flights I can remember. That being in row 42 of 45. Not like stateside travel where a good flight is one that doesn’t make you miss a flight, is delayed, or doesn’t make you completely miserable for any number of reasons, no, this flight was actually enjoyable. And the attendants… Yes.

Waiting with my USD $4 cup of instant machine coffee for our hopper to Edinburgh. Beer and food and sleep await. Only here a few moments; sadly not enough time for a legal spliff.

Till the next free WWW hotspot…

Travel Notes

Return trip style.

While I certainly do not travel as much as the old days, I’ve successfully managed to escape the full-body-radiation-scan. Look at the outline of my bollocks all you want just find a way to do so sans x-ray penetration.

On that note I’ve also successfully bypassed security with weapons in tact and undetected: my fists of fury- deadly weapons in 49 states. I’m golden in Vermont apparently.

LAX s.u.x.! Flying into LA is depressing. The layer of smog hovering over the landscape is breathtaking…and not the Mt. Rainier kind either.

Awaiting my flight to SATX, there’s a flight to Las Vegas next door. The douchebaggery is as expected. I suppose you needn’t land in Vegas to look and act like an asshole, flight to Sin City will suffice.

To the very kind, yet clueless lady who sat next to me on this past flight, there are two separate international signs for I ain’t in the mood to chat: 1) open book or mag, or 2) headphones in/on ears. For eff’s sake I certainly shouldn’t have to resort to both measures.

Oh air travel.

Travel Notes

And other thoughts in general.

Air travel used to be awesome. Perhaps that had more to do with being a kid, but I’ll blame it on the TSA.

Houston International still sucks.

Was asked to trade my seat with an old lady so she could sit near her friend. My seat, aisle. Her seat, middle. Told her to jog off! (kidding- I switched. It did tilt me for a minute though)

Being on a plane is far too close than I ever want to be to 99.99999999999% of any human. If I can smell your dragon breath you can smell my farts- TOO CLOSE!

Speaking of farting on a plane, where fabric seats are far superior to leather. Think about it…

This I’ve pondered before. Why is it that a majority of dudes feel the need to spit in the urinal? It’s like an automatic reaction. Even in my dipping days, with a wad in, I never spit in the urinal. Not that I care, it just seems like an odd phenomenon.

Enough poopoo & ka ka for one post, eh. I’m here, on the train to Seattle. I feel better already. It’s about to pop off!

A few thoughts on a few things:

I’m going to reserve comment on the whole Kona business right now. I will say, however, that it’s interesting to me when these “issues” go viral and everyone looses their shit over them. I would love to see the same enthusiasm over what I consider to be huge domestic emergencies, i.e. the state of our food system, the problems facing our education system, the obesity epidemic regarding our children, our personal freedoms and Constitutional rights disappearing virtually overnight… I could go on and on. It seems these issues are only important to the fringe “wackos” like myself, but keep in mind, they affect YOU in every way on a daily basis. I’m certainly not suggesting what has been happening for decades over in some place you’ve never heard of, have never been to, or a place you previously could care less about, is not important right now. I’m just saying there are some massive domestic housekeeping issues here, which pretty much garner no attention, and that makes me sad.

Michigan State University to offer ‘zombie survival’ course. Incidentally, this will also help you survive in Detroit. I’m not sure why I’m not teaching this course.

FAA says flying will be a ripoff for the rest of the decade. Ya don’t say… 

Virginia continues to be an anomaly of buffoonery. In a week they decline to participate in the NDAA and sign this ‘ultrasound’ bill. But at least they’re consistent in their inconsistency… just look at history going back to colonial times; a “slave state” while at the same time a bastion for radical revolutionaries. Wacky place, that Virginia.
 
2 kids living in an abandoned school bus. Naturally a sad story, but there are failures here on many levels. People would see the kids “running around at night”? The kids telling other kids they bathe twice a week?… homeschooling? A “great aunt caretaker”? No red flags here… Unfortunately Texas was hit pretty hard with the “refugees” from NOLA. There were undoubtedly many legit cases of need, obviously, but there were also many, many cases of fraudulence.

This chick won a million bucks from a lottery and is still using the welfare system. She’s not the only case, apparently. What a boondoggle our welfare system is. Again, idiots at all levels here. Perhaps you’d be surprised how long I could live off of $700K check. 

Lin-sanity ends in San Antonio! I’m just using the term but I totally blame ‘Melo. Here’s a newsflash: ‘Melo is an a-hole and probably not a very good teammate. They are 2-5 since his return. D’Antoni doesn’t have the bollocks but I would sit his ass like a mug! The real story here is that no one respects the Spurs. I’m counting on them creeping up on some fools in the playoffs. Everyone will be looking at the LAC and LAL and OKC…sleeping on San Antonio, baby!

Personal note: my poor macbook could be dying. I bought it in late 2007. It has been the best puter I’ve owned. Nearly five years is a pretty good life considering how much time I log on the dang thing. I’m gonna keep’er rolling here as long as I can but may be looking at a new silly in the very near future. Not exactly in the budget but I did save for “emergencies”. Does a new laptop qualify? —Does a bear shit in the woods?

Another 0230 wake up

Travel day. San Antonio to Houston to BWI to San Antonio. In one day. My pack, chockablock full of food and reading. Another blast.

***EDIT side note: I’m done with the tipping every bloody person who does anything. Not talking, of course, of wait staff or bellhops, etc, but the clown outside of the terminal who does “curbside check-in”, or in other words, the guy who weighs my bag, charges me $25, then moves my bag four feet to the left…then holds out his hand. Screw that! I guess it’s good faith payment that my bag will find its way to the plane, eh. ***

Ahh ‘Home Crap Home’

A week of no human interaction, Sōcrates will bitch and squawk all night at us. He’ll be especially happy since we just walked in the door and immediately walked out to hit up Trader Joes. That bama will be just fine!

F flying btw. I have too many grievances to list! The whole experience puts me in a sour mood…an then I realize I’m back in DC which compounds the misery.

Nothin but fun.

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